No, I haven’t run out of speed trap stories.
This one, from John Carver, of Lacombe, might be the ultimate speed trap tale:
“I was born in Gulfport and grew up on the Mississippi Gulf Coast. Living in New Orleans in the 1950s, I visited my folks on the coast often.
“Those were the days when U.S. 90 was the main route between New Orleans and the coast. It was a two-lane road until it became a four-lane highway eastward at Bay St. Louis, Mississippi.
“From traveling the road so often, I knew the local sheriff strictly enforced the reduction of the speed limit from 60 mph to 45 mph as soon as the four-lane started. I was always very careful to slow down there.
“However, one day in late 1956 my reduced speed was in vain!
“A little past the start of the four-lane, Mississippi state troopers waved over about 10 or 15 cars, then let traffic go through.
“The state cops convoyed our group about a mile to what had once been a small, single-room store. All contents had been removed except an old manual cash register.
“A local justice of the peace told us, ‘Guilty or not guilty, $10!’ As soon as all of us paid our fines, we saw the troopers wave over another group of cars.
“I guess that was the state troopers’ version of one-stop shopping!
“That was the only time in many trips I ever witnessed such shenanigans. They must have made enough money to last for a while.”
Take that, Yank!
Barry Dufour, of Carencro, presents evidence that while the British might have lost the Revolutionary War, they are well ahead of us in the Beer Wars:
“Articles about drinking reminded me of a day trip I took while stationed at RAF Lakenheath in the early ’70s.
“I learned quickly that British beers are very, very strong and served at room temperature.
“A U.S. Air Force major transferred to our unit bragged about his drinking abilities. One Saturday I invited him to meet us in Cambridge to visit some English pubs and sample their beers.
“I would order ale, which is the easiest to drink and not as strong, while the major ordered some of the strongest beers they had.
“I had to drive him back to the base…”
Kid food
After our lengthy discussion of ’mater sammiches led to recollections of treats such as condensed milk sandwiches, we heard from Charlie Anderson, of Shreveport:
“Talk of childhood sandwiches reminded me of my two favorites: butter and sugar, and banana with mayonnaise.”
My versions are slightly different:
Make that butter and brown sugar, add cinnamon, run the open-faced sandwich in the oven or toaster oven, and produce cinnamon toast.
And put that banana on peanut butter, saving the mayo for ‘mater and/or baloney sammiches.
Special People Dept.
Helen Hebert, of Baton Rouge, whose 99th birthday was June 29, celebrates Wednesday, July 13, at Garden View Assisted Living.
Young at heart
A “fun nun” story from Mary Kay Cowen, of Marrero:
“Growing up, everyone’s favorite aunt was my father’s older sister, Aunt Ouisie.
“She was a nun who loved life and people. Often she would show up at our house with her Twister game because ‘the other nuns would not play.’
“With seven children, there were always kids ready to play.
“So many stories about her float through my mind, but we will save those for other days.”
Yat translator
Judy Savoie says after Hurricane Katrina hit the New Orleans area, a national chain sandwich shop in Metairie’s Lakeside Shopping Center brought in employees from up north to help.
“I noticed customers asking for ‘mahnez’ from a bewildered employee.
“Since my parents were from the Midwest and I was raised in Metairie, I am ‘bilingual.’
“I translated ‘mahnez’ to ‘mayonnaise,’ and all was well.”
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