Myth busting: Many empty nesters are looking for bigger homes, not downsizing

One of the occupational hazards of being a real estate agent is that while scouting sale properties for a client, you can walk into a home you suddenly have to have.

“We were not looking to move,” said Suzanne White, a 58-year-old Realtor from Memphis. “My husband and I had never discussed it.”

However, like so many couples, they had had the wouldn’t it be nice if … conversations. She’d always wanted a pool and the space to host big parties. He wanted a music room and a woodshop.

“But these were casual wishes,” she said. Not enough to drive them from their 2,800-square-foot home of 17 years, where they had raised their blended family of four now-grown children, and from a neighborhood and neighbors they loved.

Finding that special home

That changed in the fall of 2020, when Suzanne White walked into the 4,225-square-foot home in Cordova, Tenn., a 15-minute drive from her East Memphis home. “I quickly saw that it checked all the boxes,” she said.

Uh-oh.

The brick house had a pool, a detached garage perfect for a woodshop, all downstairs bedrooms, a covered porch, turnkey finishes, lots of room inside and out for parties, and plenty of yard for their two large Sheepadoodles to romp.

She went home and told her husband, now 60, “You need to look at this house. But don’t worry, we’re not moving.”

Uh-huh. By that afternoon they were writing an offer.

Choosing more space

Suzanne and Mark White are among a growing number of adults over age 55 who are bucking tradition. Typically, when the kids leave home, parents downsize. However, more couples as this stage of life are choosing to upsize, or same-size, to a home that offers more of what they want, according to a new report from the National Realtors Association.

“One of the persistent myths we have about retirees is that they want to downsize, but that’s not true today,” said Jessica Lautz, an economist and a lead researcher behind the 2023 Home Buyers and Sellers Generational Trends Report. Of those between the ages of 58 and 76 who bought homes last year, most were same-sizing, and nearly one in five bought homes over 3,000 square feet.